there are so many times where i woke from my dreams wondering about my name and where i was, sometimes so intense that i have an existential crisis throughout the day and for the next few days. there are some dreams that are so real they feel more realistic thean my waking life. so real, that that person feels more me than the one i am when i wake up. so intense, it feels like im really living that life. it gets me excited.
it feels like how that one boy probably felt when he woke up after seeing the lamp that seemed too fake to be real, glitchy of sorts, leaving a life of so many years and memories and family and relationships.
i strongly believe half of my dreams are not made by my brain, i dont think possible for it to make me feel something so real and something so different than i have ever experienced in my normal life. it feels i live various secret lives at night which i forget after a while but are just as real. maybe i astral project without knowing it.
this may just be my wishful thinking in the worst case scenario, however life and the universe is too vast and mysterious for it to not have a possibility of being true. the amount of times ive had my gut instincts about weird things be so true, random coincidences that are deffo not coincidences, that i dont believe so much in “realistic things”.
i remember this one dream that i had, where i was in a room, and i was shit scared for some reason, “i” did not know the reason, but the body i was in knew. suddenly theres this person coming from some other room, he had a knife in his hand, and i started walking backwards, “i” was more scared than the body, my mind was screaming, but the body was calm and was simply walking backwards, i remember suddenly knowing that this isnt my life and that i did not have to go through this. lol i start blinking my eyes hard, blinking multiple times in a second knowing that it was a trick to wake up in my life. just as i was about to get stabbed, i wake up blinking hard in my reaL LIFE, panting furiously, still feeling the knifes point inches from me.
i remember wondering if i got stabbed in the dream or not. and i remember feeling deep inside me that the story went on somehwere else, that it wasnt a dream that stopped after i woke up.
i will find an answer to this in this life, i will prove it to myself at the least.
thats it for today. bye guys.
